hmm..tak reti guna blog system yang baru..
cepatnya.rase dah 3 tahun blog ini.ahaha
those yang active blogging pun sekarang either mia, or suam-suam kuku.
hukhuk,everybodies busy growing up i guess.ahh masa muda ;')
nanti lah.
mungkin kena shut down ini belog.
tulis lain.
yang memberi isi
memberi makna.
sekian
yen di kejauhan..
(jauhhh sangat)
Monday, July 30, 2012
Monday, May 21, 2012
Asbab
Bismillahirahmanirahim..
ehem,how do i start this?so long ey?
this blog dah naik bersawang,(btw,did u know,institusi kekeluargaan yang paling rapuh ialah keluarga labah-labah?since the child will kill their mother when they're able to feed themselves,especially the black widow species..) rasa-rasa macam dah kena campak blog bersawang ini dalam longkang.it felt like yesterday, that i frst posted,back then,sweet perak.how time flies.and yet, i were still the same.unmoving.Naudzubillah.But u know,me is being me lah,sangat sayang,cannot let go this secret treasure of yours truly.ehehe
Saya pun taktau atas sebab apa saya masih menulis,masih menaip di atas keyboard, dan sebentar lagi masih menekan butang publish, i seriously have no idea of what am i doing, but somehow,i have to share.to tell, the journey that i've begun, in search of finding myself,my passion,truly where my heart lies (InsyaAllah).
As for most of u yang confirm-confirm la taktau hehe, i'm in a phase of life that i love to call as transition.a hijrah,to be a better person,insyaAllah.this might come to u as 'oh yeke' or 'oh,erm x kesahlah,whatever' or 'oh,okbye' whatever u love to call, but somehow, i feel like i'd love to share it with u,this is like a declaration,that "i've been reverted' to islam (no, not that i'm not muslim before, this is like renewing my iman,to islam,which i embrace 'seadanya' before.) this also, will act as my reminder, my barrier, later, that i've been here, so i shouldnt've look back.(May Allah strengthen my iman.ameen)
As for most of u yang confirm-confirm la taktau hehe, i'm in a phase of life that i love to call as transition.a hijrah,to be a better person,insyaAllah.this might come to u as 'oh yeke' or 'oh,erm x kesahlah,whatever' or 'oh,okbye' whatever u love to call, but somehow, i feel like i'd love to share it with u,this is like a declaration,that "i've been reverted' to islam (no, not that i'm not muslim before, this is like renewing my iman,to islam,which i embrace 'seadanya' before.) this also, will act as my reminder, my barrier, later, that i've been here, so i shouldnt've look back.(May Allah strengthen my iman.ameen)
I still remember, few months ago, i'm in the state of hallucinating myself with erm,i don't know how to describe it, perhaps we shall call it jiwa kacau.I seems fine,i laugh, i cry, i stare,and that's it.there's emotion, but no soul involved.Along that time, i started to ask myself with a question one by one.celaru, the questions,unanswered questions that lingered around my head macam banyak sangat.yang keep popping is 'Sampai bila nak macam ni?' macam ni merujuk pada my then lifestyle.Iya, bertudung, solat, tapi that's it,tudung tu tak bawa kesan seculas pun pada hati, solat masih tak mampu nak kawal diri dari mengata orang, sumpah seranah orang.Then come the next questions.Do i doing it correctly,or i just doing it for the sake of 'melepas batuk di tangga'.Then satu-satu mula display, satu-satu mintak jawapan, It was like.u know..let me explain u briefly about this Q&A within my head,
Q: yan, kenapa pakai tudung?
A: sebab Allah suruh?
Q: oh sebab Allah suruh.mana buktinya?
A: ada dalam Al-Quran?
Q:so?setakat bagitau ada dalam Al-Quran?even ur 5 years old niece can answer that.i wanted the proof.what surah?ayat ke berapa?can u answer that?u can't don't u?
:(
Q: u are what u believe in, does u act according to what u believe in?
A:yes.kot.
Q:so u r sure u will be submitted to heaven once izrael comes?
A: ntah,i don't know :(
For so long, saya leka, saya terikut-ikut,betul tak if saya katakan agama islam dalam diri kita ini cuma agama ikut-ikutan,orang sembahyang,kita sembahyang, orang tinggal sembahyang,kita tinggal sembahyang,sometimes without solid reasons, padahal kita mengaku mempercayai syurga dan neraka.dan lazimnya kita mengakui balasan orang tidak bersembahyang itu azab maha pedih di neraka,atau apa benar?kita ini tergolong munafik?mulut berkata lain sementelah hati berkata lain,lantas terlambang dek perbuatan kita.betul kan?Masya Allah, may Allah saves us dear brothers and sisters :(
Alright, masing-masing mesti ada cerita sendiri kan?macam,tak kan tiba-tiba.like so tiba-tiba.Actually in my case, it is,memang tiba-tiba.the urge tu datang pagi, and the significant event come later that night.the night that were still fresh in my head.
So this is my asbab.dengan izin Allah.
kita asyik merungut gaji kita tak cukup, pemimpin kita menindas, negara kita tak maju, sampai kita lupa nak bukak mata luas-luas, about others, sampai lupa nak timbang tara, keperitan tahanan kita dan tahanan di luar sana.asyik larut dalam dunia kita, yang leka diulit bahagia,terlupa mereka, menangis sehari pun belum tentu dapat sesuap nasi.kita merungut anak dara kita lari dibawa bangla, kita terlupa anak dara mereka hari-hari diperkosa.Maka apa kita masih tega meminta tanpa pertama mengingati mereka?
kalau kita tak tergerak, berfikir sekarang, berdoa, berusaha sekarang, apa bisa?kita lahirkan seorang lagi Mu'tasimah?apa bisa? kita lahirkan seorang lagi Salahudin Al-Ayubi menakluk dunia?
The rise of Islam, itu janji pasti.tapi kita?apa sudah sedia?apa persediaan kita?
The choice is in ur hands afterall.
p/s:
-Seruan menutup aurat/bertudung (An-Nur ayat : 31)
-Balasan orang yang aman padahal telah berbuat dosa (Al-An'am : 44)
Q: yan, kenapa pakai tudung?
A: sebab Allah suruh?
Q: oh sebab Allah suruh.mana buktinya?
A: ada dalam Al-Quran?
Q:so?setakat bagitau ada dalam Al-Quran?even ur 5 years old niece can answer that.i wanted the proof.what surah?ayat ke berapa?can u answer that?u can't don't u?
:(
Q: u are what u believe in, does u act according to what u believe in?
A:yes.kot.
Q:so u r sure u will be submitted to heaven once izrael comes?
A: ntah,i don't know :(
For so long, saya leka, saya terikut-ikut,betul tak if saya katakan agama islam dalam diri kita ini cuma agama ikut-ikutan,orang sembahyang,kita sembahyang, orang tinggal sembahyang,kita tinggal sembahyang,sometimes without solid reasons, padahal kita mengaku mempercayai syurga dan neraka.dan lazimnya kita mengakui balasan orang tidak bersembahyang itu azab maha pedih di neraka,atau apa benar?kita ini tergolong munafik?mulut berkata lain sementelah hati berkata lain,lantas terlambang dek perbuatan kita.betul kan?Masya Allah, may Allah saves us dear brothers and sisters :(
Alright, masing-masing mesti ada cerita sendiri kan?macam,tak kan tiba-tiba.like so tiba-tiba.Actually in my case, it is,memang tiba-tiba.the urge tu datang pagi, and the significant event come later that night.the night that were still fresh in my head.
So this is my asbab.dengan izin Allah.
kita asyik merungut gaji kita tak cukup, pemimpin kita menindas, negara kita tak maju, sampai kita lupa nak bukak mata luas-luas, about others, sampai lupa nak timbang tara, keperitan tahanan kita dan tahanan di luar sana.asyik larut dalam dunia kita, yang leka diulit bahagia,terlupa mereka, menangis sehari pun belum tentu dapat sesuap nasi.kita merungut anak dara kita lari dibawa bangla, kita terlupa anak dara mereka hari-hari diperkosa.Maka apa kita masih tega meminta tanpa pertama mengingati mereka?
kalau kita tak tergerak, berfikir sekarang, berdoa, berusaha sekarang, apa bisa?kita lahirkan seorang lagi Mu'tasimah?apa bisa? kita lahirkan seorang lagi Salahudin Al-Ayubi menakluk dunia?
The rise of Islam, itu janji pasti.tapi kita?apa sudah sedia?apa persediaan kita?
The choice is in ur hands afterall.
p/s:
-Seruan menutup aurat/bertudung (An-Nur ayat : 31)
-Balasan orang yang aman padahal telah berbuat dosa (Al-An'am : 44)
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Paradigma
Its funny how jealousy can turn u whoopsie downsie, once u let it go, u actually start to move on and able to look the same situation with different perspective.and the jealousy u first felt will somehow turn into something extremely odd, and finally you can just laughing or smile at it..later,much later, when the green feeling (jealous i mean) came, trust me, u can smile, or maybe, just maybe, the green bubbles boil your head up but u can simply switch it with another feeling in a flick of seconds.trust me, but first of all, u have to let go,or give up or anything to put the jealousy aside.it may require a knock on ur head, or a significant event, or simply a practice of mediation...
Q : what if something that we did absent mindedly is the one that put the extra kilos on our bad deeds in judgement day?
A : though i would love to say t'was ok, we wont go into hell cos we didn't realize we did that tapi, i still searching for the dalil to prove it, my brain ni sekarang,hmm.payah nak control.we need facts. (me and my brain)
Ah ye,Q & A is from yours truly :)
Statement : I want to be better.but better is hard, let alone the amount of 'steady' needed to put into it.I fail, many times.(eh bole ke many times??ahaha)
Q : what if something that we did absent mindedly is the one that put the extra kilos on our bad deeds in judgement day?
A : though i would love to say t'was ok, we wont go into hell cos we didn't realize we did that tapi, i still searching for the dalil to prove it, my brain ni sekarang,hmm.payah nak control.we need facts. (me and my brain)
Ah ye,Q & A is from yours truly :)
Statement : I want to be better.but better is hard, let alone the amount of 'steady' needed to put into it.I fail, many times.(eh bole ke many times??ahaha)
Monday, March 19, 2012
HIJRAH
nak pindah tempat kerja!
SERONOK!
tapi masih blur-blur
like seriously?
ok.
doakan saya berjaya :)
p/s : i guess back to ur ma n pa armpit will never go wrong.heheh :D
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Why i dont dress up like other girls did
its easy,
i'm not your stereotype of girl kot,
yala,i memang la baik,hahaha (- -'') but i'm not that baik u know...
why labeling me as ustazah?
it wasn't my fault isn't it if i cant live up to your expectations?
i choose kurung as my everyday wear to the office because it is practical.
formal and yet let me moves easily, (o yeahh i got the moves like jagger (; )
and why care so much about my appearance?so scary i dont get a boyfriend ah?hihi
kaks,(did i mention s there?) i know u wants me to looks stylish and not kampungan with kurung and all that,
but if i am comfortable this way,why should u feel the other way?
i thought ramai org suka tgk anak gadis berbaju kurung?oh tak eh? hehe
its funny dowh how after a year,you guys still debating about my appearance..
*ah dont bother this silly story kids,perhaps its just my naughty mind (or my touching heart) hehe,
secondly, i'm not an ustazah. but yes, saya sedang mendalami agama yang saya anuti.
is it wrong?
ustazah jeke blh ckp pasal agama?
what about our Prophet Muhammad S.A.W?he's a shepherd, businessman, motivator, strategist,haaa nak cakap apa lagi??if we were to make him our idol, why can't i talk about how we should divide pusaka according to faraid and at the same time let me be minah rock bawak motor that u used to admire.aigoo.melalut la pulak..peace <(- -,)>
oh ye,alang-alang i speak like an ustazah today, i want to share with you a little of knowledge i gain after attending a raudhah (taman syurga) just recently,ehehe kidding.,manada taman syurga..p majlis ilmu la,kan equal to sit under raudhah Allah.. :)
Actually the title of the ceramah by Datuk Abu Hasan Din Al Hafiz that i attended last two night was 'Pembinaan Keluarga Bahagia Asas Kecemerlangan Ummah' but i would love to share these two points that i think we can apply on our daily lives.not limited in institusi keluarga itu sahaja.
2 faktor utama kebahagiaan atau ketidakbahagian :
1. Ego
-ego,according to freud (he's a famous psychologist) bermaksud,(saya ringkaskan ye) sebahagian dari personaliti diri kita yang menghalang kita dari bertindak dari apa yang sepatutnya,
contohnya,my friend tegur i kaler plan drawing too pink..should tone down the color a bit, tapi oleh karena ego nya seorang izyan ni, i color the plan more pink,padahal itu ialah plan asrama jantan.muahaha.
according to Datuk Abu Hassan Din Al-Hafiz pulak, org ego ni,bak kata orang utara, 'cerdik tak boleh menumpang,bodoh tak dengar kata' hihi,diorg ni asyik nampak salah org je,perasan diri bagus la kononya..padahal,hampeh..(oh setepek ke mukaku),org yg asyik nampak salah orang ni payah..sebab nanti sendiri buat salah, tapi salahkan org lain,sangat bahaya in any relationships pun.tak kisah lah mak dgn anak ke,bapak dengan menantu ke,bos dgn pekerja ke,sesama rakan sekerja ke,kalau dapat the opposite tu sama-sama ego,lagi la parah,so seeloknya buang la sikap ego ni ok,sikit-sikit takpe..banyak-banyak nanti takut jadi begok pulak.huhu tau tak begok tu apa?p la tgk sinetron indon.ngee :D
2.Jahil tentang peranan dan tanggungjawab
masa ceramah tu, Datuk Abu Hassan Din Al-Hafiz tu terang ikut tajuk ceramah,jadinya lebih terjurus pada hal-hal kekeluargaan, tapi kalau kita nak apply dalam hidup seharian kita pun boleh kot, jadi biar i explain according to me okayh ;)
apa makna jahil? tak tahu kan? so dalam islam, kalau tak tahu kita kena buat apa?yes, ambil tahu,belajar,malah everybody pun tahu tuntutlah ilmu dari buaian hinggal ke liang lahad..insyaAllah..and hadith yang i tak tahu perawinya tu pun ada ckp tuntutlah ilmu hingga ke negeri china..bila dah ada ilmu, baru lah boleh beramal,baru lah jelas, o,tujuan kita hidup ni nak sembah Allah, o..tangungjawab seorang hamba kepada tuhanNya ialah menunaikan hakNya...hah barulah dah tak jahil.see?
applicable to other situations too i think, contohnya, saya tak pandai nak submit tender drawing dekat majlis, so saya kena la tanya my boss, tanye which drawings nak kena print, tanye admin borang apa nak kena prepare, bagi tahu my colleagues yang buat drawing tender tu untuk print 6 copy of blue print, one set linen and so on,and so on..so bila siap barula rasa enlightened hehe.so bila masing-masing tahu what to do,and tak kedekut ilmu nak ajar, barulah hidup kita aman, selesa dan bahagia!heee :D (ok semangat nak start dekat office.hihi)
Sebenarnya banyak lagi nak share,tapi kang kelaka pulak haa,cakap banyak-anyak.tapi sendiri pn belum habis mengaji (belajar), i mean, kalau nak tanya, tanya pada yang ahli ok, kalau tak pun tanyalah ustaz,pagi-pagi kat tv9.hee :D elok sangat nak buat isi jiwa.
eh saya ni memang cakap ja pandai..agama-agama mana boleh letak tepi...tapi..psst..konsert evanescence nak p jugak (excited nak jumpa korang ni maznah, nisa'!!!),so dont really put high expectations upon me okayh? i'm not your ordinary next door girl, i'm fantabulous.(fantastic + fabulous).ehe.blood vomit.
..peace.
i'm not your stereotype of girl kot,
yala,i memang la baik,hahaha (- -'') but i'm not that baik u know...
why labeling me as ustazah?
it wasn't my fault isn't it if i cant live up to your expectations?
i choose kurung as my everyday wear to the office because it is practical.
formal and yet let me moves easily, (o yeahh i got the moves like jagger (; )
and why care so much about my appearance?so scary i dont get a boyfriend ah?hihi
kaks,(did i mention s there?) i know u wants me to looks stylish and not kampungan with kurung and all that,
but if i am comfortable this way,why should u feel the other way?
i thought ramai org suka tgk anak gadis berbaju kurung?oh tak eh? hehe
its funny dowh how after a year,you guys still debating about my appearance..
*ah dont bother this silly story kids,perhaps its just my naughty mind (or my touching heart) hehe,
secondly, i'm not an ustazah. but yes, saya sedang mendalami agama yang saya anuti.
is it wrong?
ustazah jeke blh ckp pasal agama?
what about our Prophet Muhammad S.A.W?he's a shepherd, businessman, motivator, strategist,haaa nak cakap apa lagi??if we were to make him our idol, why can't i talk about how we should divide pusaka according to faraid and at the same time let me be minah rock bawak motor that u used to admire.aigoo.melalut la pulak..peace <(- -,)>
oh ye,alang-alang i speak like an ustazah today, i want to share with you a little of knowledge i gain after attending a raudhah (taman syurga) just recently,ehehe kidding.,manada taman syurga..p majlis ilmu la,kan equal to sit under raudhah Allah.. :)
Actually the title of the ceramah by Datuk Abu Hasan Din Al Hafiz that i attended last two night was 'Pembinaan Keluarga Bahagia Asas Kecemerlangan Ummah' but i would love to share these two points that i think we can apply on our daily lives.not limited in institusi keluarga itu sahaja.
2 faktor utama kebahagiaan atau ketidakbahagian :
1. Ego
-ego,according to freud (he's a famous psychologist) bermaksud,(saya ringkaskan ye) sebahagian dari personaliti diri kita yang menghalang kita dari bertindak dari apa yang sepatutnya,
contohnya,my friend tegur i kaler plan drawing too pink..should tone down the color a bit, tapi oleh karena ego nya seorang izyan ni, i color the plan more pink,padahal itu ialah plan asrama jantan.muahaha.
according to Datuk Abu Hassan Din Al-Hafiz pulak, org ego ni,bak kata orang utara, 'cerdik tak boleh menumpang,bodoh tak dengar kata' hihi,diorg ni asyik nampak salah org je,perasan diri bagus la kononya..padahal,hampeh..(oh setepek ke mukaku),org yg asyik nampak salah orang ni payah..sebab nanti sendiri buat salah, tapi salahkan org lain,sangat bahaya in any relationships pun.tak kisah lah mak dgn anak ke,bapak dengan menantu ke,bos dgn pekerja ke,sesama rakan sekerja ke,kalau dapat the opposite tu sama-sama ego,lagi la parah,so seeloknya buang la sikap ego ni ok,sikit-sikit takpe..banyak-banyak nanti takut jadi begok pulak.huhu tau tak begok tu apa?p la tgk sinetron indon.ngee :D
2.Jahil tentang peranan dan tanggungjawab
masa ceramah tu, Datuk Abu Hassan Din Al-Hafiz tu terang ikut tajuk ceramah,jadinya lebih terjurus pada hal-hal kekeluargaan, tapi kalau kita nak apply dalam hidup seharian kita pun boleh kot, jadi biar i explain according to me okayh ;)
apa makna jahil? tak tahu kan? so dalam islam, kalau tak tahu kita kena buat apa?yes, ambil tahu,belajar,malah everybody pun tahu tuntutlah ilmu dari buaian hinggal ke liang lahad..insyaAllah..and hadith yang i tak tahu perawinya tu pun ada ckp tuntutlah ilmu hingga ke negeri china..bila dah ada ilmu, baru lah boleh beramal,baru lah jelas, o,tujuan kita hidup ni nak sembah Allah, o..tangungjawab seorang hamba kepada tuhanNya ialah menunaikan hakNya...hah barulah dah tak jahil.see?
applicable to other situations too i think, contohnya, saya tak pandai nak submit tender drawing dekat majlis, so saya kena la tanya my boss, tanye which drawings nak kena print, tanye admin borang apa nak kena prepare, bagi tahu my colleagues yang buat drawing tender tu untuk print 6 copy of blue print, one set linen and so on,and so on..so bila siap barula rasa enlightened hehe.so bila masing-masing tahu what to do,and tak kedekut ilmu nak ajar, barulah hidup kita aman, selesa dan bahagia!heee :D (ok semangat nak start dekat office.hihi)
Sebenarnya banyak lagi nak share,tapi kang kelaka pulak haa,cakap banyak-anyak.tapi sendiri pn belum habis mengaji (belajar), i mean, kalau nak tanya, tanya pada yang ahli ok, kalau tak pun tanyalah ustaz,pagi-pagi kat tv9.hee :D elok sangat nak buat isi jiwa.
eh saya ni memang cakap ja pandai..agama-agama mana boleh letak tepi...tapi..psst..konsert evanescence nak p jugak (excited nak jumpa korang ni maznah, nisa'!!!),so dont really put high expectations upon me okayh? i'm not your ordinary next door girl, i'm fantabulous.(fantastic + fabulous).ehe.blood vomit.
..peace.
Saturday, January 28, 2012
Who knows?
I'm not used to rejection,
trust me,i cried.
Assalamualikum,hai :)
eh ada ke yang baca..
say hai back if u read this :D
erm,dah dekat 4 bulan kot tak post anything..
phew,apaa nak jadi dengan azam menulis dengan lebih banyak?
ye..tak perlu jawab, (jadi sampah)
oh..i miss u blog,real much..
actually ada benda nak bagi tau,tapi kita segan la awak,nak sedih-sedih,nangis-nangis dekat belog,
but who cares?
huhu,
what i mean by i'm not used to rejection is...
my application for master has been rejected..
so i cried. ;(
secondly,my MUET result dah keluar,
sadly,band achieved is 4..9 more marks to band 5,211/300
ptuii.. my goal is band 7.ahaha.
but apaa la boleh buat,
mungkin boleh teghai lagi skali pasni.
so so,
everything is on track balik kot,
since i can't continue to study,
maknanya lebih banyak dan banyakk holiday, ;)
secondly,i should count marriage on the list.eh?
perhaps its time to review my life balik,
kena keluarkan idea,bloop..bloops (kua cam bubles)
planning,space arrangement, section,front facade,side elevation, perspective, details and all,
nak beli rumah, kereta baru..oh dewasa memang menyeronotkan ye..
most important, kena kuatkan lagi bonding dengan Dia.
pamilia,tok cha,nephew, nieces,academician, pious man,
dan kawan-kawan. (i miss u guys so much, maznah,nisa')
2012,berlaku baiklah padaku :)
trust me,i cried.
Assalamualikum,hai :)
eh ada ke yang baca..
say hai back if u read this :D
erm,dah dekat 4 bulan kot tak post anything..
phew,apaa nak jadi dengan azam menulis dengan lebih banyak?
ye..tak perlu jawab, (jadi sampah)
oh..i miss u blog,real much..
actually ada benda nak bagi tau,tapi kita segan la awak,nak sedih-sedih,nangis-nangis dekat belog,
but who cares?
huhu,
what i mean by i'm not used to rejection is...
my application for master has been rejected..
so i cried. ;(
secondly,my MUET result dah keluar,
sadly,band achieved is 4..9 more marks to band 5,211/300
ptuii.. my goal is band 7.ahaha.
but apaa la boleh buat,
mungkin boleh teghai lagi skali pasni.
so so,
everything is on track balik kot,
since i can't continue to study,
maknanya lebih banyak dan banyakk holiday, ;)
secondly,i should count marriage on the list.eh?
perhaps its time to review my life balik,
kena keluarkan idea,bloop..bloops (kua cam bubles)
planning,space arrangement, section,front facade,side elevation, perspective, details and all,
nak beli rumah, kereta baru..oh dewasa memang menyeronotkan ye..
most important, kena kuatkan lagi bonding dengan Dia.
pamilia,tok cha,nephew, nieces,academician, pious man,
dan kawan-kawan. (i miss u guys so much, maznah,nisa')
2012,berlaku baiklah padaku :)
win some, lose some,
insyaAllah,
rezeki Allah itu ada,
janji Allah itu pasti,
qada' dan qadar,
'Be, so be it'
Alhamdulillah,syukur
insyaAllah,
rezeki Allah itu ada,
janji Allah itu pasti,
qada' dan qadar,
'Be, so be it'
Alhamdulillah,syukur
;)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)